Employee Policy Update Needed!

Can you smell that? Actually it is more of a feeling.

Sort of a… Crisp yet decisively cold twinge that makes you feel refreshed and alive!

That’s the feeling I get nearly every morning as I step out the door for work. A large lungful of fresh 30ish degree air with no humidity to thicken it, no bugs buzzing around in it, and no one else around breathing it.

It has been cleansed by the frost that dropped overnight. Genuine, grade triple A plus, sparklingly fresh, smell free, life sustaining air.

“Now this is what morning is supposed to be,” I smiled and sucked in another lungful.

I could feel the crispness from my nose down to my lungs and it sent a tiny shiver down my spine. A tingly one as though every nerved ending in my body approved of absorbing as much as possible.

And then it happened…

As I stood with shoulders squared, head held high feeling like a million bucks and watching the mostly clear sky begin its mesmerizing transformation into daylight, I put my coffee mug to my lips.

I wanted to savor the flavor as it rolled across freshly awakened taste buds. Instead I got a steaming hot river of java flowing from my chest down to my crotch.

 Note To Self : Self, double check that the lid is screwed on your mug before you walk away from the counter…

Talk about killing the mood! That is the equivalent of breaking one of those kisses with your wife (that is going to get you somewhere), and uttering the words “Honey those jeans do make your butt look fat.”

And in that same ‘did I just say that’ way, I asked “Did that really just happen?”

Let me tell you what I learned. Spilling coffee throws one’s whole day out of whack!

And therefore I propose Spill Coffee Days To be listed right next to Personal Days and Vacation Days in the company policy book.

I’m even OK to concede that it must be real coffee not  one of those whipped, and sprinkled, pampered, and foamed frapa- whatevers. No offense to those that drink them, but come on. After all you tortured and added to it can you really still call it coffee?

I use flour for hotcakes, so should they be called flourcakes?

Anyway, who’s with me? Give me a plus +1 in the comments box, and Ill see if I can find my way over to Wikipedia and get it defined!

Just remember, peaceful demonstrations only please, and if you spill your coffee that morning STAY HOME!


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